39: It's hard to fear death
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[00:00:00] Hello and welcome to the Rise Empire podcast. I'm your host, Jo Phoenix. I'm a Master Mindset and Manifestation Coach, Kundalini Yogi, and your new Spiritual Bestie, helping you reclaim your sovereignty and tap into your full potential so you can live your most tuned in and turned on life. Here, we'll talk about all things mindset, manifestation, and spirituality.
The highs, the lows, and everything in between. Tune in weekly for all the juicy conversations, inspiration, tips, tricks, and motivation to get your week started right. Let's dive in to this week's episode.
Jo: Ooh. Hello. Beautiful souls and welcome back. So, okay. Today, I think we're just going to do kind of a riff on.
what's been on my mind lately so let's get into it. Okay. So as I was doing my [00:01:00] makeup this morning. I kept getting stuck. On a post that I made. On one of my old Instagram accounts and it was the quote that. It's hard to fear death when you've seen firsthand, what it takes to keep someone alive. Now let's kind of unpack this a little bit.
Why it's been on my mind in the first place. Okay. So I was just kind of.
Not really reminiscing, but reviewing my life thus far and how much. I seemed to have accomplished in such a little time and how little I feel like I have accomplished in that same amount of time after that.
So, let me just take you back. To 2012.
It's March. Uh, 2012. My son has just turned one. I have just enlisted in the air force reserve sworn in all of that good stuff. Fast forward to August. I'm working as a waitress at a restaurant called the [00:02:00] ranch. It's like a country version of Hooters. It didn't last long.
So I'm waiting tables and just enlisted.
I'm. Trying to get my life on track. Right. So.
the job that I chose in the air force reserve was building. Big munitions. I was a munitions systems specialist. Or as we lovingly liked to call ourselves ammo, K. And when you think about ammo, I want you to think about a bunch of heathen kids. Or old drunk men because that's essentially what. We were.
So I go to basic training in August, graduate in October, go to tech school, Wichita falls and. Oh, and this one pivotal day. We were learning how to build all of these big things that go, boom. And destroy all kinds of stuff. And on this one particular day, [00:03:00] we were watching videos of Apache helicopters below and shit up. And B 50 twos carpet bombing, like entire cities. Y. To boost. Morale.
And it was that day that I was like, Hmm. Maybe. I should. Like reverse, my karma. Because I'm building all of these things that can essentially wipe out. Whole cities. And. Maybe I should be trying to like save somebody and we're watching this, these videos. And we're like, yeah, this is so great. Like holy smokes, like heaven help anybody who messes with the U S. Right. And that's just. That's what. We did, it was the way to boost morale and looking back. Even in the moment, I was just like, oh, There was some part of me that was like, damn. Okay. So I'm taking lives over here. Building things that can potentially take [00:04:00] lives depending on how they're used.
Yeah. No. And, um, maybe I should be trying to help people. Right. And I was just a reservist. So after basic tech school and STP is seasonal training program,
I would be off of orders and I'd be going back to civilian life and fulfilling my reserve duties of a one weekend a month and two weeks over the summer. So. As I'm trying to figure out what I'm going to do with my life.
I'm listing out all of the things that I like to do. And one of the things that really stood out was helping people. So a couple of things that I could do were on that list. One of them being a nurse and another one being a paralegal. I started taking a couple of classes while I was in on STP for paralegal. And I decided that that's not what I wanted to do. So after STP. I applied to. My local community college. And started taking all the pre-recs for nursing [00:05:00] school. I ended up getting into LVN school and decided against that and opted to go straight RN. But the thing is before I decided like, oh, let me be a nurse. I did not want anything to do with the human body with anatomy. I thought our bodies were weird and the processes that we went through were gross and. All kinds of stuff. Okay. I hated biology.
I did not like science class. It was just. Too much information for me. That I wasn't able to quite grasp onto at the time. And I don't know if that was because, you know, I just, I wasn't ready for it at that point, or I just, I'm not sure. But something changed. Because as I was taking the pre-recs for nursing school, like all of the amp, all of the microbiology, something clicked, something changed. And all of a sudden the human body was. [00:06:00] Miraculous. To me like. It's fascinating.
Right? We do so much. And our bodies do so much on autopilot for us. It knows exactly what to do to compensate for certain things or to fight off certain diseases. Our bodies are pretty freaking incredible. Well, I'm just going to put that there. So. The whole reason. That I became a nurse. Was so that I could reverse my karma. Every time we went around, In class to like introduce ourselves or, And even still to this day, when I had to go to orientation, because I went from agency to, hospital staff. Last year. When we went around introducing ourselves. And the reason we became a nurse or got into healthcare in the first place.
My answer is always because I built things. That could take lives. And I felt like I needed to reverse my karma. So that's why I became a nurse. Not because I [00:07:00] had some. Family member who is really sick. And I spend a lot of time in the hospital. I hated hospitals. I did not want to be near a hospital.
I thought they smell like bleach and disinfectant. And there was so much death that I just didn't want to be a part of it. And now I work in a hospital. Whoa. Oh my gosh. How did we get here anyway? Throughout nursing school, I always assumed. That I was going to be a clinic nurse. That I was going to, you know, Help people in a clinic setting and hill. I had. Clinicals in the ICU.
And that is. Truly when I fell in love with nursing, with the human body, with. Everything. That we do. Anyway. I was that nurse that would go round with the crystals in my pockets. And. Imagining a protective bubble around myself before shift. And I still do the protective bubble and get my [00:08:00] energy right before shift. But I no longer carry crystals in my pockets because I've washed them too many times.
They would end up in the washer and then end up rattling around in the dryer. So I don't carry crystals anymore, but.
I do know that my intention. For the day. Plays a major role in how the day goes. Anyway. So, how does all of this connect with. That post that I made. Forever ago. That says that it's hard to fear death. When you've seen firsthand what it takes to keep somebody alive. And what's been on my mind recently is that I'm not. I'm not afraid of dying and that, and we shouldn't be afraid of dying. . Death comes for everybody. It's inevitable. We will all die at some point. And. You know, my fear. Is that. I will die.
Without truly having lived. My fear is that I will die and I will not have experienced everything. [00:09:00] That I want to experience this lifetime. I want to live a life so full. That I meet death, like an old friend, like in the Harry Potter, deathly Hallows story. If you're not familiar with the story. Let me just do a quick, like cliff notes, recap on what the deathly Hallows story is in Harry Potter. Long story short, three brothers come to this. River. And in order to cross it, they use magic to make a bridge over it.
Well death rules this river, and because they outsmarted death by making a bridge over the river, he grants the three brothers each with. A. Token, I guess. One of them gets a resurrection stone where they're able to bring back somebody from death. Another one gets the elder wand, which can win any dual. And the third one gets. The invisibility cloak, which can make you [00:10:00] invisible.
So the brother who got the resurrection stone. Resurrects, the love of his life from. Death only she's not the person that she was in. Life. When she was full of life.
That brother ends up aligning himself. To be with his beloved in death. And. Death claims the first brother. I'm not entirely sure what exact order these are in, but. The next brother has the wand and he's a very powerful wizard.
But then another wizard wants the wand. So he gets unaligned in his sleep. And then death claims the second brother. That leaves the third brother. And the third brother kind of evaded death.
For a long, long time until he had lived. A beautiful, wonderful life. And he met death. As an old friend, when he was ready. And that is how I would like to meet death. I would like to meet death. Once [00:11:00] I have filled all of My desires. Once I have fulfilled everything on my bucket list that I want to do, and I feel complete in my life.
That's when I would like to meet death. But, you know, Kind of has. It's own timing. And as a nurse, I know that.
I know. That I run a risk of dying every single day. I know. That I can get in my car. And. Meet an unfortunate and untimely end anytime I drive somewhere, anytime I walked down the street, there is that. Risk. And we don't really think about it because, you know, it's not something that happens. All of the time, but I see it. A lot in my line of work and.
You know, you can be minding your own business, going up to the third story of your home in your little elevator and the cable breaks. And then you are no more true story. But it's terrifying, but I'm not going to [00:12:00] let that keep me from living my life.
Right. So. That's been on my mind lately. Right? It's hard to fear death. When you've seen firsthand. Takes to keep somebody alive.
And let me just tell you. If you've never seen a code situation in real life, that's where they're doing CPR, pushing all of the drugs. If you've never seen that in real life, it is not like Grey's anatomy. where it's all neat and clean and, you know, Organized. No,
it's chaos. The sounds. The way it feels. The way it looks
it's not at all, how it looks on TV. So I, if you've never witnessed it, I pray that you never have to witness it. If you have witnessed it you know exactly what I'm talking about.
And then there's the aftercare, right? Once you get them back, You have to keep them alive. And then there's the chance that they'll code again. And how many times are we going to run a code on somebody? Before the family decides that it's [00:13:00] enough.
So, you know, end of life, isn't. Necessarily what people think about or want to think about,
especially if they're young and healthy, but I do. Encourage you. just think about it. Right. What would you want done? What wouldn't you want done
And talk to your loved one so that they know your wishes and maybe even drop an advanced directive. If it's something that you're very passionate about and you know that your family might not want to honor your wishes. Having a legal document will help protect you.
I don't mean to make this episode morbid.
And I think what I was really getting to in this is that. One of the biggest regrets that people have on their deathbed is that they didn't live their life.
Is that they didn't do all of the things that they wanted to do. And I refuse to let that be me. I refuse to let that be me. I have huge dreams. I have. a huge bucket [00:14:00] list. I want to experience so much before I leave this earth.
So that's what I'm going to do. I'm not going to let the fear of death stand in my way and keep me from doing the things that I want to do that I want to experience. And if there's one thing that you take away from this episode. Is that.
Life is too short to push things off until tomorrow. Life is too short to push things off until next year. Alright. If you want to take a vacation planet.
Take that vacation. Make it happen. That is what. This next year for me is going to be about. Checking things off of my bucket list. We're going to do it. So. If you made it this far into the episode, let me know. What are the top five things on your bucket list? And which one are you committing to do within the next year
And that is it for this episode. I will see you next week. I love y'all. Be safe. Don't let the fear of striking out. Keep you from playing the game.
It's babe Ruth.
I'm out.
[00:15:00] Alright y'all, that's a wrap on another episode of the Rise Empire podcast. I hope you had as much fun as I did today learning about all things mindset, manifestation, and spirituality. Remember, knowledge is only power when it's put into action, so go ahead and put that newfound wisdom into play. If you loved this episode, don't forget to hit that subscribe button and leave a review.
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